Holding a Job...

...is something I have serious trouble with. I like working! As much as I hate that I have to, I like that sometimes, people are happy when I'm helping them. Even just helping them find the right card, I dunno. That's a nice feeling. But it's so tough! I had a panic attack at work today. What if I'm alone? What if I'm working and whoever is with me is on break? I can do that! I can work a pre-Christmas shift, by myself, cash, floor, card cleaning. But sometimes, it's hard enough to wake up in the morning. I need to be able to keep working. I need so much more then that, but right now, I need to be able to work. And I hate myself for not able able to.