the old lady and her cats

There once was a 40-year-old lady living across from Kenny. Kenny had a crush on the 40-year-old lady, who had seven kids and forty cats- one for every year. She used to tell him, "everytime a cat dies, I get younger." One day when Kenny went to the lady's house, he tripped over a cat and killed it. Getting frantic, he grabbed the corpse and shoved it into the microwave. Then he turned it on. The old lady gave him cookies and a special kiss, (which made him blush) and sent him back to his house across the street. Then the old lady decided to make some popcorn. She opened the package and stuck it into the microwave. Suddenly she realized there was something furry in there. Something warm. Something...with Kenny's fingerprints on it. (On it's eyeballs.) (She had laser eyes, did I tell you that?) Then she ran across the street and climbed up Kenny's garage into his room, where she had been several times before. When Kenny saw her, he screamed and ran. But then he tripped. And he killed another cat. And they put the cat in the microwave together and retreated to the old lady's house, because now she was thirty-eight years old.

Good thing they were imaginary cats.

But Kenny really does have a crush on the 40-year-old lady living across the street and her imaginary cats. He has a soft spot...for her soft spots.

Kenny's girlfriend, (Aeriana_Eve) thinks it's weird. That he tripped over an imaginary cat belonging to his 40-year-old crush. But she still joins him in chucking a puffer at the road, dancing on the rain, and hanging out with kangaroos. Because she still loves him- despite the cats.